Hi,

I have a friend who doesn't have internet so I'm seeking advice for her. I don't have kids so this is really a friend and not me. lol I'm hoping to get some advice but I also want to give as much info as I can. Sort of give some background on why this is such a hard one to solve.

Mom: 55, recovering alcoholic but clean for ten years and has experimented with marijuana in the past. Again, clean for 10 years tho. She is disabled and trying to do this on her own. When thinking about this, keep in mind her finances. She lives on about nothing. When I first met her, they had been living on potatoes for weeks. Really sad shape. Mom is also mildly bi-polar. I had to be around her a while to tell it so it is not bad but it's there.

Son: 16 Good grades in school and a pretty good kid but has some issues that I will get into. He has asthma which is not helped by smoking marijuana I'm sure.

Daughter: About mid 20's. Got hooked on drugs while Mom was drinking and daughter is in jail. Mom and son visit every chance they get and the daughters Dad does too. Son and Daughter have different fathers. Daughters Dad is there in a good way. He helps where he can including sending money to the jail for the daughter.

Sons Dad: I have never met him so all I know is what I have heard. From my understanding, he is a druggie. Not part time but pretty much full time. The last I heard he was on crack. From what I know, that is not good in any way with any color of light. It's also one reason that it may be better if he wasn't around at all.

Son smokes his marijuana at home. I hate to say but it was a family member, older cousin, that got him started on this mess when he was about 13. Mom is scared to push because of all the issues that are already there including her own and her past. Me, I'm looking to the future and how if something doesn't change, they could BOTH end up in trouble. The only good thing, law enforcement around her area is not real good. They are just not the sharpest tools in the shed. Thing is, even a broken clock is right twice a day. I'm also concerned about what changes this could make to a developing mind. It can't be good.

Since the Mom has her issues and the Dad is even worse, what would you recommend? She's afraid to tell the cousin he is not welcome because then her son would just go somewhere else to do their thing. That could lead to legal problems if the clock strikes just right. On the other hand, if something isn't done, this could cause mental issues later on down the road.

The biggest thing Mom is scared of is losing her kid. They do have a pretty good relationship all things considered.

Thoughts? Any ideas? Again, saying she is poor is a understatement. Keep that in mind. Oh, rest of family isn't going to help with anything. She's about the best one out of the bunch. I'm disabled and I help her more than all her family combined.

Thanks.